Who, Lord, Do You Say That I Am? -- Part 3

     I was back to my original question. Lord, who do You say that I am? If I’m not Your servant, than who am I? Like Jacob, I did a lot of wrestling with God. Through much pain, suffering, and letting go of the burdens I had placed upon myself, the answer finally did come. I was not just God’s servant, but He revealed to me that I am His Daughter, who happens to get to serve Him. He takes all my effort as a gift. He knows that the results of my efforts are not in my control. He reminded me that He is God and I am not. He wants me to trust Him with my children, because He loves them even more than I do. He helped me recall how He has been with me on my journey through life and that I did not always choose as He would have preferred, nevertheless, He was with me in spite of my choices. He has continued to guide and accompany me on my journey.

Who, Lord, Do You Say That I Am? -- Part 2 of 3

     When God poses a question to me, He knows I will not rest until I get an answer. The question that God had placed on my heart was, “Who are you?” I really wasn't sure. What had been such a rock solid identity was suddenly shaky and uncertain. I in turn had to turn to God and ask Him, “Who, Lord, do You say that I am?”  It took some time, but the answer did come, little by little. I knew in the depths of my heart that what I was experiencing was both a natural and supernatural evolution to a better me. I knew that I had to trust that God was involved with every aspect of this change, but that I had to be patient and surrender to His molding and shaping….no matter how painful it seemed at times.

     God had me look at the different identities I played in my life. In my early years, I was daughter, sister, granddaughter, niece, cousin and friend. Later on, girlfriend, wife, daughter, sister-in-law, mother, mother-in-law and now grandmother. I had adjusted well to each identity. I had handled our daughter’s marriage quite well and becoming a grandmother was wonderful! Why was I struggling so? What was so different now? This was a wonderful time in our lives, so why did I feel so displaced?