God's Incredible Intervention

      I felt so excited to be writing another blog post! It had been almost 11 months since my last one. So much had happened. I was compelled to tell the previous years’ story, giving glory and praise to God!

     I typed out the scripture from Tobit and began to tell the tale. The words seemed to flow from my mind on to the laptop with ease and clarity. The first draft was finished. It was time to stop for the day. Sasha would usually put different ideas in my mind the next day about what to add, what to change and how to continue. Along with that, one of my two trusty editors would listen as I read it out loud and make additional changes I might have missed. When all felt right, I would then go to the blog site and publish it.

     I have to admit, I was a little rusty with the technique of getting my post from the word document to the notebook and then to the blog site. It never ceases to amaze me how the power of prayer can help someone like me, who is not techy at all, to have blogged all these years. When I finally get it done, in spite of myself, I realize it is truly a work of God.

    After much prayer and divine intervention, the post was published! I texted some friends to keep a lookout for Avia Joy…she was alive and well! I was so delighted and couldn’t wait to receive it myself. In the past, it usually was emailed the day after it was published around 4 in the afternoon.

     4 o’clock came and went…then 5 o’clock, 6,7,8. It didn’t come. The next day came and went and no Avia Joy. I didn’t know what to do. I had no idea of the way this all worked. I only remembered what happened in the past and something wasn’t working as it had. 

          One of my sons looked into the blog site and after some time, realized that the site did not send the emails out anymore. Unfortunately, he didn’t have the time to resolve it for me that day, but at least I knew what the problem was.

     Several days later, my oldest grandson offered to see what he could do and after several hours he added an email server to the blog site. Yeah! My problem was fixed, so now I just needed to wait and see if it worked. Little did I know that a massive storm was brewing. One that would challenge and torment me into to believing I had no business to be writing and was just kidding myself that I had a gift. But I don’t want to get ahead of myself, so I’ll continue with my story.    

     When I had initially published the new post, I had begun to check the stats to see if anyone had read Avia Joy. There were several hits before it had finally gone out by email, so some people had randomly seen it. A problem arose because with a new email server, people who had received it in the past, would now have to confirm that they wanted to receive it. Unfortunately, it was going to spam for many of the past subscribers, so many of them did not even know Avia was alive and well. This began a vicious cycle for me to be distracted by checking to see who is getting it, who isn’t, who doesn’t know about it and so on. Instead of checking it once or twice a day, it was becoming a preoccupation. When the numbers were good, I was good. When the numbers were down, I was down. I didn’t know what to do and felt like I wanted to fix something. After all, Sarah’s friends wanted Avia Joy to be back and many of them were not receiving it…and who knows how many more.

     Although I was distracted by the stats and the workings of getting the blog post out, I continued to write and not allow that to throw me off course. I believed that I had made a commitment to God to tell all the wonderful things He had brought about in my life. I would not be derailed from completing my task. 

     As time went on, my distraction became an obsession, and I was checking the stats way too often. I then began to hear taunts in my mind: if God really wanted you to be writing this, you would have many more hits than you do. You’re just kidding yourself. Do you think you have a gift to write? Do you think you really make a difference? Do you think this really matters at all?

     I went to confession to confess my obsession and my sins. I know God was giving me the grace I needed to overcome myself, but I could not let it go. I was told by one priest that if it’s a problem, maybe I should stop writing; by another, don’t be so hard on yourself, everyone likes to be affirmed. 

     I talked to family and friends and got different suggestions as how to handle it; it didn’t work. I was still struggling. 

     I finally talked to a friend who asked me who I was writing for anyway. If it was for God than what difference does it make how many people are reading it. Was it for His glory or my glory? 

     Her words rang true, and I knew she was right. But I wasn’t quite ready to stop checking the stats and I justified checking with the fact that when someone comments, I have to approve it. The only way to do that is by checking the stats. 

     Okay. I would limit myself to three time a day: 10 A.M., 3 P.M., and 8 P.M. 

     I was surprised at how difficult it was for me to carry this out. There were many times I had to stop myself from wanting to check. It began to dawn on me that something more was going on here. Why did I need these statistics to validate my writing? I have had the blog for almost 9 years, and except for a brief time when I began, it was not something I struggled with. What was different now?

     After weeks of struggling and not getting anywhere, I made an appointment with a priest to talk things out. It was clear to me that I was looking for affirmation. I began to wonder if it was a wound from my past and God was allowing it to surface, so He could heal me.

     We discussed different relationships in my past when I felt as though I wasn’t good enough or didn’t quite make the mark. Father had me go through a process of forgiving those people and renouncing the spirits of ‘not good enough’ and rejecting the lies that the devil wanted me to hold on to. He told me to let go of checking the numbers of hits because as humans, we are never be satisfied and always want more. He also explained how when we get a lot of hits, a hormone that makes you feel good is released and it can become something that you crave. God can and will fill me, if I look to Him. I was to stop believing the lies of Satan and hold on to God’s truths: I am precious to God and if I’m fulfilling His will by writing, I need to look to Him only for my validation. 

     When I left the rectory that day, I felt like the burden had been lifted. I would continue my writing and check the stats three times a day, so I could publish any comments. I finally felt as though I could hand it over to God.

     Two days later, I received an email from a young woman who began to read Avia Joy a year ago. She told me how much she enjoyed it, but wanted to share how she found it. 

     She was in RCIA and was having doubts about coming into the Church because no one in her family, her husband included, were Catholic. One night during Lent, 2022, she was praying and asking God just what she should do. The name “Avia Joy,” popped into her head. She felt the need to google it, wondering why it would come to her in prayer. My blog was the first thing that came up, which gave her goosebumps, because it was a blog not only about faith, but about being Catholic specifically! It was the exact sign she needed from God to know she was on the right path.

     She told me finding it was a testament to God’s plan being so much greater than we realize. She was sure that I never believed that reading my blog would play a role in someone’s conversion to Catholicism. Her two children have been baptized as well and are now part of the Church. She shared that she still enjoys reading Avia Joy, and always thinks about God’s amazing provision. She then thanked me for sharing my faith online because I have made a big impact on her life.

     I was positively stunned as I read her words! I had been struggling for weeks now, wondering if Avia Joy made any difference. Papa touched this dear sweet young woman to let me know, Avia does. 

     I felt like Mary Magdalen on Easter morning when Jesus called her by name. God KNOWS Avia Joy! He knows her by name! He spoke her name to another of His children who was having doubts and used her to answer her concerns. He then had the young woman get in touch with me, when I needed to be affirmed that Avia Joy was called forth for a purpose and a reason. 

     I share this with you not to toot my horn, but to give you hope! Our good God knows us personally and intimately. This is a testimony to show how every once in a while, something miraculous will happen when He believes it to be necessary. 

     It is clear to me now why the Evil One wanted me to believe his lies and stop writing. He wanted me to get caught up in myself and stop trusting God and give up. Even though it was a struggle to continue at times, by God’s grace, I obeyed His call and carried out my mission.

     I realize the battle is not over and I pray that I can keep my eyes on the prize: fulfilling God’s will in my life and giving Him all the praise and glory. I must remember that I am His little one and that He’s delighted with me and Avia Joy. 

     Papa and I are celebrating Avia Joy’s ninth birthday on April 21. Please pray she will continue to bear good fruit and bring many souls to God! 

     “Glorify the Lord with me, let us together extol His name. I sought the Lord and He answered me and delivered me from all my fears.”                                                       Psalm 34 :4-5