Pondering life through the heart of Mary

     “Son, why have you done this to us? Your father and I have been looking for you with great anxiety.”

     As I meditated on those words, I felt stunned! I was familiar with St. Luke’s scripture passage about the Child Jesus staying behind in Jerusalem, not to mention the fact that I had prayed that mystery of the rosary and meditated on it hundreds of times. Maybe that was it! Because of my familiarity with this passage, I did not expect to learn anything new about it…about Our Lady…about myself.


     As I pondered Mary’s question to Her Son, that fact, that Mary questioned God, who just happened to be her Son, brought me both surprise and peace. I too had questioned God at times and often felt badly about it. But here, the Mother of God asked Him “why?” I wanted to continue my treasure hunt to see what else God was revealing to me.

     After questioning Christ, Mary told Him that she was filled with great anxiety as she and His father searched for Him. She, who accepted God’s will so completely, was anxious! That thought had never occurred to me. When I thought about Our Lady, full of grace, being anxious, it was not a feeling that I thought Mary had experienced. It showed me how very human she was…and that she had a heart of a mother with all its cares and concerns.

     Jesus answered His mother’s question by stating, “Why were you looking for Me?  Did you not know that I must be in my Father’s house?” Now I knew that I was moving into deep waters. Christ’s words to His parents seemed to be somewhat cold and harsh…but I knew since He was God, there was more to the picture than what appeared.

     The next phrase that struck me was, “They did not understand what He said to them.” As I pondered this statement, it occurred to me that there were many times that Mary and Joseph did not understand God’s will, although they accepted it and trusted, even in their questioning. God was showing me that I too was called to do this…most especially when I did not understand and questioned what was happening in my life and in the lives of my children. I needed, at those times, to trust in God’s ordaining and permissive will.

     The last phrase that struck my heart was, “And His Mother kept all these things in her heart.” That particular phrase was the key to it all. In Mary’s life, at those times when, as a mother, she may have been filled with anxiety and questioned God “why?”…along with the times when she did not understand just what was happening she was wise enough and filled with the abundance of God’s grace to then, ponder those things in her heart. She waited patiently and trusted God. Sometimes His reasons were revealed and made clear to Our Lady, but there were times when she had to submit to the great mystery of God being in charge, even when it was not apparent.

    My Heavenly Father taught me that evening that I too need to ponder the why’s and ask Him the questions to the matters of my heart. As a woman, I might not understand the events of life this side of eternity…but like my Mother in heaven, I must know that God is present in every event…most especially those where He seems lost. I need to look for Christ at those times, as Mary and Joseph did and not give up until I find Him. In doing that and bringing all the cares and concerns of my heart before God, I will reflect my Mother in heaven, who will intercede for me to her Son Jesus.